It’s the big day, folks! The day when Washington, D.C. transforms into a den of drunken revelers, ready to binge drink in celebration of one of the most important speeches of the year: the State of the Union. Because, let’s be real, who wouldn’t want to spend their evening drowning in alcohol and unhealthy food choices, all while watching a snooze fest on TV?
It’s a good thing D.C. bars and restaurants know exactly how to capitalize on such a momentous occasion. Take Union Pub, for example. This “esteemed” establishment has taken things to a whole new level with its $150 “State of the Union Pub” special. Because, you know, who wouldn’t want to spend a small fortune on two buckets of Bud Light or Budweiser, eight shots of whiskey, one bottle of sparkling rosé, and a “generous” serving of totchos? It’s an offer that’s simply too good to refuse!
But, hey, maybe you’re not into overpriced drinks and unhealthy food options. That’s okay, Union Pub has got you covered. They’re also offering $4 pilsners and $5 rail drinks, so you can still get drunk on a budget. And, of course, the State of the Union address will be shown on TVs with sound. Because, you know, the only thing that makes a tedious speech tolerable is having to endure it with the sound turned up.
Shaw’s Tavern is also getting in on the State of the Union action, offering up all of its “Taco Tuesday” specials starting at 5 p.m. Because, you know, what’s a drinking binge without a side of tacos? And, if you’re lucky, you might even get to wash down your tacos with a $9 margarita.
And, last but not least, Mission Navy Yard is also getting in on the State of the Union festivities with its “Blue Victory 2024” mixer and watch party organized by Network for Progress. This “free” event promises to bring together the DMV’s Democrats, progressives, hope mongers, and change makers. Because, you know, what’s better than drinking and watching a boring speech while surrounded by a bunch of political enthusiasts?
In conclusion, if you’re looking for a night of overpriced drinks, unhealthy food options, and a tedious speech, then the State of the Union viewing parties in D.C. are the place to be. Just make sure you bring a designated driver, or a shovel to dig yourself out of the credit card debt you’ll be buried in.
